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Thursday, June 14, 2012

'The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women: Get Off Your Butt and On with Your Training' by Dawn Dais



I hope your sitting...I'll wait..Lilo is the dog over Xmas we were ,"fostering" . The 2 grand German Shepard??  The Darling I could not live without???

Yeah..well I thought babies were cute too, and now I have two teenage girls and one boy who is trying to survive their wrath. See my point?

The other morning I  had the nerve to drive the eldest brat to High school ...while she ...give me a minute..the pain is TOO MUCH!!!

Here it is...that ball of obnoxious fur, grabbed my Kindle (yeah #4 Kindle fyi) and pulled it out of it's $30 case..chewed case...and put a tooth mark into the frame of 3 day old kindle...

I'd rather she'd put a tooth mark in FireDaddy!

FireDaddy  found this sweet and enduring as she can't bare to be away from me for 20 minutes. Well, when he said it like that, my response was completely validated...

"CALL ANIMAL CONTROL NOW!!!!!!! MOTHER $^%^!!!!!!".

Kindle #4 still works, but I feel a stabbing feeling in my heart when I spot that tooth mark...I do.

Now, I know the MANY readers I have saw the title of this book and said, "Oh $%#, it's a running book..".

If you know me at all, you know I force myself to run the minimum amount I have to. I hate marathoners. The ego's. Like it's a sport..Me, Myself and I.

None the less, years ago I found this book in hopes it would motivate me to move my butt off couch...you may call it by the title, I refer to it as THE BIBLE...

I am convinced Dawn Dais and I are related, somehow, somewhere. This is not a how to, or conquer your fears book. Oh no..this is a, " I signed up for something so far fetched and I am hating every minute of it...you will all suffer with my constant whining and complaints..".






This is one of the best books I have ever read. I have given it as birthday gifts, bridesmaids gifts and just because your one of the few I don't want to punch in the face gift.

Here is the Amazon description:

Dawn Dais hated running. And it didn't like her much, either. Her fitness routine consisted of avoiding the stairs in her own house, because who really has the energy to climb stairs? It was with this exercise philosophy firmly in place that she set off to complete a marathon.



The Nonrunner’s Marathon Guide for Women is a fun training manual for women who don't believe that running is their biological destiny but who dream of crossing the finish line nonetheless. It opens with a realistic training schedule and is chock-full of how-to's, quizzes, and funny observations, which Dais felt were lacking in the guides she had consulted.


The Nonrunner’s Marathon Guide for Women also integrates entries from Dias' journal, sharing everything would-be marathoners need to know about the gear, the blisters, the early morning workouts, the late-night carb binges, and — most important of all — the amazing rewards.


Anyone can do a marathon. This book just makes the experience a little more bearable and a lot more fun.

Gah!! Even this sounds like a gross self help book. Look, if you never want to run or get your own beer don't turn away. This book is hysterical, I am talking wake the house up laughing hysterical.

Out of no where Dawn signs up for a marathon in Hawaii. She has fantasies of jogging like she is on Baywatch and pineapple drinks are waiting for her at the finish line.

She hides nothing folks. The hate, the anger, the resentment. This is just her feelings about her running group. The marathon itself?? Whole other nightmare entirely.

Reading through the Amazon reviews, some are just mean. Keep in mind, the mean reviews? THERE ALL FROM RUNNERS. Another issue? Marathoners tend to have the personalities of dry bark..ahhh bitch all you want , not my fault you think running is a straight line for 26.2 miles is a thrill..yawn.

Here is a quote I found from Dawn on Goodreads:

“Even though I can’t tell others whether they should chase their marathon dreams, I highly recommend they do something completely out of character, something they never in a million years thought they’d do, something they may fail miserably at. Because sometimes the places where you end up finding your true self are the places you never thought to look. That, and I don’t want to be the only one who sucks at something.”


Preach Sister, Preach.






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