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Saturday, May 18, 2013

Rise of the Governor and The Road to Woodbury- Robert Kirkman and Jay Bonansinga

Hello All-
 
I speak to you from my deathbed....too dramatic?

Well, even though I went through this torture 20+ years ago, I , forced to be Soccer Mom, had to get braces. Yep.
 
Now here is a fun fact for you all. I don't cry, I don't weep in pain. Oh no, I GET MAD.
Some would dare say, "cruelly sarcastic".
 
Exhibit A:

ME: I can't believe I have to do this again!! I hate everyone who doesn't have braces, hate  em all!!!
 
FIREDADDY: Oh now, it will be worth it. Better than getting surgery, right?
 
ME: Shuuuut UP! I feel like death and I look ridiculous!
 
FIREDADDY: Oh now, I think your still cute:)
 
ME: LIKE I CARE!!!
 
FIREDADDY: Whooaa..hay, not everyone is lucky like me to be born with perfect teeth.
 
ME: Go (*&  yourself and  ^&&%  the horse you rode in on!!!
 
I apologize to no one.
 
With that said, and if I cooperate, I only have to wear these hideous things for a year at most.
It's going to be a long year...
 
On top of all this I am suffering Walking Dead withdrawals..now is not the time to desert me. Doesn't AMC know how bored I am..and now suffering??!!!
 
Monday mornings at The Place Where I Spend my Days is otherwise known as ,"Walking Dead meetings".  I work with two nurses at my office...the episode when Lori died...hours ..HOURS of bringing it up. Meryl, Andrea?? Too much for us to handle!!!! We looked forward to Sunday nights and Monday mornings! Now they are filled with dread again!! Mad Men doesn't cut it, The Vikings didn't cut it, and Game of Thrones has gone all HBO (seriously, how many damn brothel scenes are there ??!).
 
I have been reading books, particularly Zombie books. I have read some great one's....but Robert Kirkman's books have filled the hole that Walking Dead has left ..
 



 
 
 
 
Rise of the Governor
 
In the Walking Dead universe, there is no greater villain than The Governor. The despot who runs the walled-off town of Woodbury, he has his own sick sense of justice: whether it’s forcing prisoners to battle zombies in an arena for the townspeople’s amusement, or chopping off the appendages of those who cross him. The Governor was voted “Villain of the Year” by Wizard magazine the year he debuted, and his story arc was the most controversial in the history of the Walking Dead comic book series. Now, for the first time, fans of The Walking Dead will discover how The Governor became the man he is, and what drove him to such extremes.- Amazon
 
 
 
The Road To Woodbury

The zombie plague unleashes its horrors on the suburbs of Atlanta without warning, pitting the living against the dead. Caught in the mass exodus, Lilly Caul struggles to survive in a series of ragtag encampments and improvised shelters. But the Walkers are multiplying. Dogged by their feral hunger for flesh and crippled by fear, Lilly relies on the protection of good Samaritans by seeking refuge in a walled-in town once known as Woodbury, Georgia.

At first, Woodbury seems like a perfect sanctuary. Squatters barter services for food, people have roofs over their heads, and the barricade expands, growing stronger every day. Best of all, a mysterious self-proclaimed leader named Philip Blake keeps the citizens in line. But Lilly begins to suspect that all is not as it seems. . . . Blake, who has recently begun to call himself The Governor, has disturbing ideas about law and order.
Ultimately, Lilly and a band of rebels open up a Pandora’s box of mayhem and destruction when they challenge The Governor’s reign . . . and the road to Woodbury becomes the highway to hell in this riveting follow-up to Robert Kirkman and Jay Bonansinga's New York Times bestselling The Walking Dead: Rise of the Governor. -Amazon
 
 
For you true Walking Dead fans, you know about the Governor. Now I read most of the comics. To say I was disappointed in the pick of the actor who plays Governor was a understatement. He wasn't gruesome or obviously psychotic looking. For crying out loud David Morrissey is too good looking!!

I'm no fan of Andrea per say, but I understood why she batted her eyes.

Then came the first a scene which  showed the Governor getting mad...and he was scary..really scary. Then I realized why Mr. Morriessy was perfect.
 
 
Traits to look for when hiring a psychotic leader:
 
Must appeal to the elderly and parents- charm and kindness, they love that nonsense.
Kiss a couple of babies and they will be your servants for life.
 
Must appeal to the Ladies, seriously, women love drama and the idea of some cowboy (pirate, fireman, police man) saving them and providing a shower to wipe the apocalyptic germs off, well, scruples be damned!
 
Men have to be impressed with your leadership abilities and superior strength.
 
Convicts, yes they will be there with you. Psychotic leaders have to flip the psychotic switch on. They must fear you or those skills that got them in the big house will come in handy.

Score a swagger like walk. This is the universal trait that incorporates all the groups listed above.

The first book explains who the Governor is. He didn't swagger on through the apocalypse, in fact he hid behind his big brother..Philip. That's right, The Governor is not who he says. I actually had empathy for his character. He was terrified of everything around him. He also very protective of Penny, his...nope not going to say it.  As much as I LONG to tell all, I'd ruin it for you.

Robert Kirkman , who is the writer of my beloved Walking Dead program, and author Jay Bonansinga  have managed to tie both books into the show. For you die hard's that refuse to read as you fear it will be something so different your lives will never be the same, do not fear.

The second book, "Road to Woodbury" , our Governor is well established. There is a new group of surviors...I know..I know..others survived besides Daryl, Carol and Rick, shocked me too. They stumble into Woodbury. Lily, our main character, figures out that the Governor is not who he says he is.

For those gruesome freaks out there who fear you can't read gore and action. Stop hitting rewind on Hershel's amputation scene. Reading these books feels like your watching the show. The descriptions for wimps such as myself are realistic..infact I managed to wince my way through it.

I hate spending money on e-books. These were worth it. GAH! Can't believe I said that. It filled the void. Both were well written. I am anxious to see if the Governor's story comes out in the show. Until then, the friends at work and I will continue to discuss our Walking Dead predictions, we will attempt to survive Sunday nights , look at pictures of Daryl, until October...

The third in the series is due to come out on  September 24th. Four days before my birthday. Someone should buy it for me. After all, I'll be 40, with braces.

These books will please everyone who likes  Sci fi, apocalypse, zombies, and even some romance for you smutty smuts out there.

If a Zombie apocalypse hits I only have two requests. First, round up all Orthodontists and feed them to the hoard. Gives us time to escape.

The second, have Alicide  (Pesticide as FireDaddy refers to him ) on Talking Dead one last time. We found that quite delightful.

Until later Folks!






Wednesday, May 8, 2013

I'm back!!

Hello All-

I know, I know...I have been a slacker..what can I say?

Good news? I have been reading like a crazed woman!! TONS!!

Bad news? The place where I spend my days has been sucking the life out of me...hence , blogging had to go aside for a break.

Well, it's that time of year..yes, soccer tryouts..oh it's hideous. I'm not sure what's worse..the fact that my eldest is driving and going into U-17 or I am at the last stretch of 39 years old. Oh I know, 40 is where it is at....but I feel more like a 4 yr old...none the less....here we go..

So I will begin the reviews tomorrow...see? I told you, now I have to do it.

Well, I must say, I'm sure all of you have seen that jackass of a CEO from Abercrombie & Fitch today..if you have been living under a rock or assume I am speaking of bird watching here is a snippet of his announcement....

“In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids,” he told the site. “Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don’t belong [in our clothes], and they can’t belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely. Those companies that are in trouble are trying to target everybody: young, old, fat, skinny. But then you become totally vanilla. You don’t alienate anybody, but you don’t excite anybody, either,” he told Salon.

Basically , the man is refusing to let his stores carry anything over a women's size 10 or anything XL. However, he will carry XXL for men as they,"are muscular athletic types". He goes on to say his customers should look like they just hopped off a surfboard with washboard stomachs...

This man is trash. Now as a adult he just pisses me off.  For the gorgeous teen girls out there who are size 12 and above this man just confirmed whatever insecurity they have...and for that, he has to pay.

So Mr. Jackass, this is to you. Let's begin with yourself. Take your plastic surgeon to court, dear God, maybe the Dr. squeezed him self into some of your teeny tiny jeans, passed out and dropped the scalpel? Every hideous picture I have seen of you, your eyes look jaundiced. Usually that means Mr. CEO likes his drink- a -doodle...which explains that muscular reverse washboard tummy you have developed.

To the teen girls you have ripped apart today. I only hope they have pissed off Mumsie's who can talk them down off the cliff .You are vile...you are so vile you make me want to eat a huge chocolate cake just to hear what you have to say.

My hope is these gorgeous size 12 and up gals develop into confident size 12 and up women. Women who are brilliant. Brilliant women become brilliant things. For instance, one of these gorgeous gals that you dumped on may become a president of a bank. A bank that comes to foreclose your big house and your penis replacement car.

As I am sure you realize, you pretty much have lost everything by now.

These gals will go on and realize you are really just a loser in high school who couldn't get the gorgeous size 12 and up girl...but be forewarned there is one thing you should know, women never forget comments like you made today.

Karma's a bitch Mr. CEO, and it comes in a size 12..

Until tomorrow!